I will be leaving tomorrow evening for Texas again. I will have treatment on Thursday at 10:00 and fly home Friday morning. Please pray for a safe trip and that all goes well with my treatment. Ian will be at home with the kids. Parker does not want me to leave him again. He keeps asking me if I like to leave him. Hopefully he will understand better after this trip that they won't be as long each time. I keep telling him only two days, but he doesn't really get the concept of time. He just says it's alot of hours. I will post after treatment and let you know how everything went.

I know I'm a little late in writing this, but I'm home! I was so excited to be home with my kids that I haven't even looked at the computer. When we pulled up to the house on Friday, Jamie had the kids outside with a welcome home sign waiting for me. I have never been so excited to see my kids! I have enjoyed being with them this weekend, reading books, snuggling in bed and loving on them. My in laws came in yesterday and have taken them out for a little while, so I thought I would use a little quiet time to catch up on my blog.
The trip went well and I am now four chemo treatments down. We have the next three weeks scheduled. I will leave on Wednesday night, have treatment Thursday mornings and come home Friday. My mom and I will be going this time. Ian will stay home with the kids. We just felt it was too soon for both of us to leave them again. They were happy with the fact that Daddy would be staying with them. I think Ian will go with me every other time so it's not too much on the kids. Wednesday is coming quick and I will be gone again. As far as how I am feeling. Well, I did not feel real well the last two days. I was really run down Saturday and yesterday I was nauseous most the day. But, today I woke up feeling a little better. Hopefully I'll get a couple of good days before getting chemo again. My pain is a little better. It seems to come and go more than being constant. Hopefully it will continue to just go away.
I am back on all my supplements and strict diet. We had backed off a little bit because the doctor said it was too much on my body all at once. Please pray that my body will continue to be able to deal with all the change that it is going through and begin to heal itself. My goal is to get my ph level up. I need to be in an alkaline state because the cancer cannot live that way. It likes to be acidic. If I can get my ph to be 7.0 then the cancer will quit growing. If it is 7.4 the cancer is dead. I am at 6.5 right now. This is a major goal. So, please pray that I can get to 7.4 because then this monster will not be able to thrive inside of me. I am going to kick him out one way or the other!
Thank you again for all your prayers and support!

Thank you for everyone's comments on my blog and on facebook. They are so encouraging and usually make me cry tears of joy that you all care. You make me feel at home reading your comments which is where I would like to be right now. Two more days and I will be home for 5 days before leaving again.
I woke up this morning in alot of pain in my chest and back. I took pain medicine and mom suggested that we go down in the jacuzzi. The hot water on my back at night in my shower seems to help. So, we did and it did feel good. We stayed in for quite a while and then sat in a lounge chair in the sun and soaked up the beautiful weather that we had today. We decided to get dressed and go get some lunch at this nice little family run bakery. They have good homemade salads and soups. It's hard saying no to all the yummy bakery stuff, but the lunch is worth it. We then walked down the little main street and went into a few shops before finally coming home. I did really well and it was so beautiful out today. It was good for me to get out. And then, the night begins to set in. Nights seem to be the hardest right now. The pain begins and the shortness of breath. Oh, by the way, the nurse called today with the results of my chest xray. Not what I was hoping for, but still believing! I now have a pleural effusion on the right and left lobe of my lungs and fluid inside my right lung as well. The pleural effusion is fluid between the lung and the sac around my lung. I knew I had the right pleural effusion which was mild and it is now increased to moderate. Needless to say, I was disappointed. But, it does explain why I am so short of breath. Just taking a shower completely wears me out. The doctor is not going to take any action at this point, but will be watching closely. This is just side effects of metastasized cancer and hopefully it will respond to the chemo.
Please continue to pray for pain relief and peace. I'm on this roller coaster that is easy when your feeling good, but when you start to feel lousy, it's much harder.
I forgot to tell you that I did have a wonderful surprise today. We had a knock at the door this morning and there was a box of flowers for me. All the way from Romania! My little Rebecca sent me flowers to encourage me with the nicest card. It put such a big smile on my face and tears down my cheeks. Thanks Bex! I love you soooo much!

Treatment in Texas (a photo update)

Three treatments down and who knows how many to go. But, I'm three down. I feel like I have accomplished something! I did pretty well today. My blood sugar has become pretty predictable. It has taken exactly 22 minutes each time for my blood sugar to get below 44. It makes things go a little smoother to know when it's coming and everyone gets ready for the next step. Ian and Mom are with me every minute praying and supporting me. I'm so grateful to have them here. I think I have mentioned before that it has metastasized to the skin on my breast. He decided today to inject chemo directly into the lesions. I knew it would be uncomfortable. But, it was pretty painful. I just closed my eyes and gripped the chair. I felt like my skin was on fire. It continued to burn for several hours later. Needless to say, I am not looking forward to that again. I am also very short of breath and having to sleep sitting up to breathe. My pet scan had showed fluid on my lung, but minimal. So, I let him know today and he ordered a chest xray, which I have done. Hopefully we will have results tomorrow. I'm praying that the fluid has not increased. I don't want to have to have my lung tapped. I was actually able to go get some lunch afterward before it hit me. I haven't been able to do that yet. We came back to the hotel and I slept for about two hours and actually felt pretty good when I woke up. I'm tired, but a little better than previous treatments. He is going to increase the amount of chemo on Thursday now that I am beginning to tolerate it a little better. I'm praying that goes well since we have to get on the plane very early Friday morning. Going home to see my precious kids will be worth it no matter how I feel. There is good news! When I woke up today, it felt like the tumor has shrunk a little. Not gone by any means, but, I actually have soft tissue spots. I looked at my mom and burst into tears. I said "Mom, I think it has shrunk just a tiny bit". We both looked at each other with tears streaming down our face. I was telling Robyn today that this time is so different as far as the tumor goes. The first time, I had the mastectomy first and never had any pain and the tumor was gone. This time, it is very tangible and I am constantly feeling it to see if it has changed. It makes it harder that I am living with this thing inside of me. So, to feel a small change was a milestone that I so needed today. The doctor told us today that I will continue to have one treatment a week for the next four weeks and then he will order the pet scan and re-evaluate at that point. Three more days until we head home. Can't wait!!!!! Please continue to pray that my pain will go away in my back and chest. Nights seem to be the worst.

I'm having a hard time keeping my head up this afternoon and evening. I did so well this morning. But, I crashed this afternoon. It is so hard to keep your head up when you feel lousy. I keep trying to remind myself that it could be so much worse. But, honestly, it's hard sometimes. I have two days off before chemo again, so I know I will start to feel better. Just trying to keep my eyes on the prize!

Home from treatment this morning. It went much smoother today. I woke up very anxious and did not want to go. Ian prayed over me and I got up and began to get dressed, but, I still felt so much oppression. I met with a psychologist yesterday and that went well. We worked on my anger. I have just recently began to be very angry that this cancer is back. I think it's been such a whirlwind and I haven't had the time to stop and think about anything. But, the last few days have given me time to think. We worked through some of those emotions yesterday, which was good. I told Ian that I just seem to be in a funk. I'm so run down that it feels like I don't have the energy to fight and my battle has just began. So, all of these feelings brought on anxiety this morning. My Dad called me on the way to chemo and prayed with me on the phone and reminded me that fear is not of the Lord. Once I got there, I felt better and things went really smooth. It took about 22 min. for my sugar to drop. And we caught it at 40 instead of 29, before we started the chemo. I did not sweat as bad this time and then freeze. I am sleepy, but the doctor says that is from the insulin drop. And just everything is taking a toll on my body. I am not nauseous though, which is a big plus! The cramps started in the office, so they gave me some more electrolytes and also gave me a prescription to help with the cramping. So, what started out to be a gloomy day, has so far been wonderful. I am going to just rest today and take it easy.